Hare Krishna: Shit happens rama rama ding ding.
Hinduism: This shit happened before.
Islam:If shit happens, take a hostage.
Zen: What is the sound of shit?
Atheism: No shit!
Buddism: When shit happens, is it really shit?
Protestantism: Shit wont happen if I work harder.
Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it.
Jehovas witness: Knock, knock.... shit happens.
Mormon: Shit happens again & again & again.
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to me?
Rastafarianism: Lets smoke this shit!